Saturday, February 11, 2012

Apologies

I have a friend--we'll call her Scraddie--and this friend and I are notorious for going to each other's houses and then sending middle-of-the-night remorse emails. We lie in bed, one or the other of us, picturing the glorious evening, heads thrown back in laughter, Chinese Checkers and 2 or 4 bottles of wine, staggering out with a sober partner and overtired kids way too late. . . and then we picture (doh!) what must have been a kitchen full of dirty dishes, a playroom strewn with Lego, properly effusive thanks unspoken. It got to the point where she created a blank template for us to use:

Dear ____________________,

Thank you so much for having us over for ___________________ (dinner/ 
brunch/cocktails/birthday party)
We all had a _____________ (nice/great/fantastic) time.

I am so sorry that I drank too much and didn't help clean up.  I'd  
also like to apologize for _____________________ in your  
________________.  I hope it wasn't too much of a problem.

All my best,
___________

And then we found someecards.com, where you can design your own cards with your own text.





We're thinking of publishing a whole line of domestic regrets. I'm bracing myself for a sudden onslaught of wealth.

17 comments:

  1. Scraddie10:34 AM

    I'm still laughing out loud.

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  2. Anonymous3:16 PM

    love!!

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  3. THought I was the only one who did this...

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  4. Anonymous3:54 PM

    that is too funny. a moneymaker!

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  5. Tina G7:27 PM

    Brilliant!

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  6. I'd absolutely buy these because I do this too. And it is usually with some couple we recently met and very much like and want them to like us too. They have kids the age of our kids and teach at the university and have that lovely old house, etc. (total couples crush) and then you have too much to drink and your kid poops on their floor and you wonder if they could possibly like you as much as you like them. Sigh. Anyway, lovely idea for a line of cards.

    Completely unrelated: gave the game Sleeping Queens to our now 8-year-old for her birthday and it is a total hit. Thank you for the recommendation!

    Also, you should read "The Call" by Yannick Murphy. http://www.amazon.com/Call-Novel-Yannick-Murphy/dp/0062023144

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  7. hahahahahaha!!! Catherine, you're HILARIOUS!! I really wish I had met you in person while I still lived there in A. you know, when I read your title, I just shook my head and wondered "Apologies? What in the world does she have to apologize for?" but obviously now I understand. :)

    hey, the other day I thought of you a lot because I stumbled upon a poem that you used to quote a lot (Mary Oliver's "The Summer Day." It's been a while since you've mentioned any poetry... any recommendations to us?

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  8. I'd like to create one from when my son was 2 and pooped outside on my friend's lawn and another friend *stepped in it* 5 years later it's funny, but in a gagging, shuddering way.
    "Sorry we're a little behind in potty training and hope you were able to wash all that poop off!"

    my word verification was "plops." Exactly.

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  9. Ha! My cards would picture me dragging a tantruming three-year-old out by his arms, or slung over my shoulder, with the words, "I figured you would rather I remove my child and his ear-splitting screams from your home than that I stay and help you pick up the Legos. I owe you one."

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  10. Perfect!! I rarely sleep well after a night at a friends house for this reason!!

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  11. Anonymous8:19 AM

    Hilarious! I need these cards!

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  12. Anonymous12:15 AM

    i would love these!

    can you add one that reads 'sorry my dog pooped in you driveway at your 4th of july barbecue.'

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  13. libramom10088:47 PM

    Also appropriate for play date fiascoes!

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  14. mrs.craig3:38 PM

    I'm SO glad to know I'm not the only one who has those kinds of nights! Those cards are INCREDIBLY wonderful. xoxo

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